HACKSCHOOLING MAKES ME HAPPY

I did not think that I would be learning something about school during my Thanksgiving break. I was just scrolling through twitter passing time & I came across this inspiring video in a tweet. What caught my attention was that a celebrity tweeted it & it just so happens that it was a TEDxTalk. ALSO it had mentioned hackschooling & happiness in the title, coincidence? I think not.

I will not spoil anything else for you. Just click play & be inspired by this 13 year old boy who believes that hackschooling makes him the happiest kid out there. Xx

FINALLY DONE APPLYING TO COLLEGES (sorta)

My entire life has led up to this moment. All the constant stress, nagging, & work load has prepared me for college. I'm glad I got to submit my UC applications to UCLA, UCRiverside, UCSD, & UCSC on Wednesday! I was so sick & tired of these college applications, but now they are submitted. There is no turning back for me. I was (luckily) able to submit my CSU applications to Fullerton, LA, Sonoma, & Long Beach State back in October.

The only reason why I waited so long to submit was because I had difficulty writing my personal statements, just like I do with whatever I write. My writing never seems good enough & I just feel like it can get better. I just don't know how to make it better. But I just had to stop over thinking it & just submit.

Now I just have to submit to Cal Lutheran & I will be all set!

THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX

1. The place I've chosen as hell is ordinary, completely boring and empty. But I do believe the mind can exist in hell in a beautiful place. The mind creates their own version of hell & I feel that the mind can fear a beautiful place. That it is not attainable & that they are not deserving of it, this beautiful place is haunting them. I feel like the mind is capable of finding peace in a hellish environment. They have to want peace so bad that they are willing to battle their most feared external/internal demons to achieve it.
2. Hell is never-ending. Hell drags on & on until you think its over & picks right back up again. You do not get the chance to breathe, there is a constant weight over your shoulders that makes living unbearable. With hell, one can only handle so much so they find distractions to cope from the hell that they are in.
3. Sartre creates an atmosphere that is familiar to an individual. He describes everyday activities that we unconsciously do & presents them in a way that we never thought twice about through his dialogue between Garcin & Valet. Lights can be blinding, often bright lights can deceive you from a destined path, create a misleading place of desire. The lights can represent the future, but since the future is so bright, you become lost on your way to capturing this light. Garcin asks questions that seem absurd to Valet, but actually start to unravel why things are this way. Everyday you become succumbed to the comfort of hell that you just get used to it, to the point that you don't know anything else besides hell. Hell is like a roller coaster that you can never get off of. You experience all these twists & turns & right when you think the bad part is over, you are spun backwards. You never even saw it coming.

BRAIN WITH 8 LEGS

I am in a group with Erica, Izamar & Nakesha. We have decided to read (Great Expectations by Charles Dickens) an average of 40 pages a night to finish by the end of Thanksgiving break. We have decided to create a new blog titled "Greater Expectations" to present our findings, questions, etc. We all decided it would be best if we contributed to every aspect of this assignment instead of having our own individual part.

VOCABULARY #9

aficionado: (noun) an ardent devotee, enthusiast, fan

-The Supernatural aficionados have dedicated entire blogs for their favorite show. 

browbeat: (verb used w/ object) to intimidate by overbearing looks or words, bully

-Never let a browbeat oppress you from being who you are & doing what you love. 

commensurate: (adj) having the same measure; of equal extent or duration 

- The test tubes have to have the same commensurate of chemicals in order for the experiment to run smoothly. 

diaphanous: (adj) very sheer & light & almost translucent or completely transparent

-The cancer had run its course, & you were now able to see every vain beneath her diaphanous skin. 

emolument: (noun) profit, salary, or fees from office or employment; compensation for services

-The emolument will be paid in full once we receive the stipend in the mail. 

foray: (noun) a quick raid, usually for the purpose of taking plunder; a quick sudden attack 

-Our school was not prepared for this sudden foray of pranks by the opposing school. 

genre: (noun) a class or category of artistic endeavor having a particular form, content, technique or the like 

-No matter what someone will always have a criticism of  this genre of literature because of the controversial topics present. 

homily: (noun) a sermon, usually on a biblical topic & usually of a non-doctrinal nature; an inspirational saying or cliche

-Graduation tends to be full of homilies of how that graduation class was the best & how they are the future. 

immure: (verb used w/ object) to enclose w/in walls, to shut in, seclude, confine, to imprison; obsolete, fortify 

-Depression, if you choose to let it, can take over & begin to immure within every ounce of your being. 

insouciant: (adj) free from concern, worry, or anxiety; carefree; nonchalant

-No matter what I do, I cannot  shake this feeling of regret & be insouciant from the problem. 

matrix: (noun) something that constitutes the place or point from which something else originates, takes form, or develops 

-Matrices help form the infrastructure for the architectural blue prints of the building. 

obsequies: (noun, plural) a funeral site or ceremony

-I have attended too many dismal obsequies in my lifetime. 

panache: (noun) grand or flamboyant manner; verve, style, flair

-Damon has that charisma that just entices people to be around him; that panache that no one can replicate. 

persona: (noun) a person's perceived or evident personality, as that of a well-known official, actor or celebrity; personal image, public role 

-Elena's persona was constantly changing & no one could seem to keep up with her multiple attitudes. 

philippic: (noun) any orations delivered by Demosthenes, the Athenian orator, in the 4th century b.c., against Philip, king of Macedon; any speech or discourse of bitter denunciation 

-Do not blame me for your faults & use that philippic language towards me, all I've done was help you through these trying times. 

prurient: (adj) having inclined to have, or characterized by lascivious or lustful thoughts, desires, etc.; having a restless desire or longing 

-The difference between someone who surfs & someone that is a surfer is that surfers have a prurient longing to be in the water & in the sun. Surfers cannot go a day without surfing. 

sacrosanct: (adj) extremely sacred or inviolable; not to be entered or trespassed upon; above or beyond criticism, change or interference

-Ancient burial grounds are infamous for being sacrosanct & anyone who does trespassed is punished. 

systemic: (adj) of or pertaining to a system 

-Fangirls belong to a systemic fandom where they obsess over their idol & practically dedicate their lives to them. 

tendentious: (adj) having or showing a definite tendency, bias or purpose 

-Most are tendentiously inclined to stick with what they know & avoid any change or difference that they know nothing of. 

vicissitude: (noun) a change or variation occurring in the course of something 

-These past events had rekindled more vicissitude in my life than ever before. 

WE HANG TOGETHER

• Inter-organizational relationships can be competitive, interdependent or a combination of the two
• Organizations are interdependent in terms of their performance & organizational cultures
• In the late 80's & 90's this shifted to corporate strategy & association b/c of global marketing, converging tastes, ever-shortening lives of technology & product cycles & large capital investment demands
• Strategic alliance: various collaborative relationships & endeavors
• When executives & managers are forced to create strategies for partnership & cooperation they must  do it in a way that fits their organization & human resources
• Corporate leaders, academics & pundits often mistakenly characterize business endurance as competition rather than dependence
• Darwin's model of evolution illustrates the natural tendencies of organisms to create relationships, networks & communities
• The "fittest" are not necessarily self-sufficient but diverse, most adaptable & interdependent
• Human factors such as trust & communication play a significant role in the successful implementation of interdependent effort
• They will also naturally sabotage any initiative that does not fit their value systems
• Collaboration unless required or sanctioned by an authority figure is considered cheating
• To achieve ideal independence, something must be sacrificed & what is lost is the sense of teamwork, belonging to something that is greater than oneself
• A collaborator must be able to justify his investment in a strategic relationship by promoting the benefits of creating a strategic relationship or create fear for the ramifications of acting w/o it
• Acting out of self-interest can conflict w/ what is good for the alliance; which is influenced by societal, cultural & organizational influences
• By allowing & encouraging relationships to take place among companies, departments, individuals & other members of online, market, & geographical communities, companies can achieve multiple goals in marketing, PR & good will of altruism
• Effective interdependence facilitates not only business success, but the preservation of an environment in which for-profit & non-profit ventures thrive

SONNET ANALYSIS #1

• Italian roots from Sonneto
• meaning little song/sound
• divided into two parts: Petarc & Petrarcan
• initial section octet & 2nd sextet
• sonnets are 14 lines
• Shakespearean couplet, Petrarcan

A POETIC INQUIRY

I chose to use my 2nd Big Question because I find it to have more relevance to me right now. 

"Why is our society good at "pretending"? We pretend to be happy or pretend to be something we're not. Nowadays pretending seems what we do best. Society seems to be faking it to make it. Why must we pretend? Why must we pretend to be something other than ourselves? Why aren't our standards good enough for society, that we have to stoop to their unattainable idea of perfection? For in the end, we only lose ourselves to what we pretend to be. Is pretending truly worth it?" 

Sonnet 138

When my love swears that she is made of truth,
I do believe her through I know she lies,
That she might think me some untutored youth,
Unlearned in the world's false subtleties.
Thus vainly thinking that she thinks me young,
Although she knows my days are past the best,
Simply I credit her false-speaking tongue:
On both sides thus is simple truth suppressed:
But wherefore says she not is unjust?
And wherefore say not that I am old?
O! love's best habit is in seeming trust,
And age in love, loves not to have years told:
Therefore I lie with her, and she with me,
And in our faults by lies we flattered be.

http://www.shakespeares-sonnets.com/sonnet/138

11:11 on 11/11

I would just like to point out that since 2001 there has been twelve dates and times that have been the same numerical order once a year for twelve years. Last year being the last time this will happen for another 100 years or so.

01:01:01 on 01/01/01

02:02:02 on 02/02/02

03:03:03 on 03/03/03

04:04:04 on 04/04/04

05:05:05 on 05/05/05

06:06:06 on 06/06/06

07:07:07 on 07/07/07

08:08:08 on 08/08/08

09:09:09 on 09/09/09

10:10:10 on 10/10/10

11:11:11 on 11/11/11

12:12:12 on 12/12/12

How cool/strange is that?? Just let this all sink in.

Hamlet Essay

Hamlet's character is compulsively smart and cunning. He does not seem so articulate during your first prognosis of his character. The way he was able to get Polonius to do his bidding without him knowing is brilliant! He puts all of his actions, thoughts and beliefs out into the world which is a locutionary force. Hamlet's acting and speech has made most question his sanity. It  is a given that one would assume that Hamlet is suicidal, quite despaired and frankly all over the place. But in fact he is quite the opposite, his character is quite developed as an individual. He may not seem able to collect his thoughts and actions well, but he is able to put everything together for his personal satisfaction. His scheming against each character is well thought out and works in his favor.

With each soliloquy has its own distinct characteristic depending on whom Hamlet is around. Each character has had ambiguous opinions of Hamlet's well-being, but none have yet figured out that they are all a player in his game. When he is around other characters he puts on this facade so that they believe what he wants them to believe. Hamlet can portray a composed and rational person when around those he trusts or someone who has completely lost his marbles for those who are out to get him. He plays the role of being mad quite successfully. Rather when he is alone he is not composed and lets his vulnerable side show. The debate in his head on whether or not he should act to correct an injustice or give up is perlocutionary. Though he may be just a character of many in this play, Hamlet portrays real human qualities.

As an individual one experiences their own internal/external struggles, thoughts and events. It does not matter what walk of life we are from, just that we are human. I for one can be too much of a human. Everything I do, think, or experience seems to be magnified on a much larger scale. I self-overhear more than I am supposed to. I probably spend more time over thinking and saying that I will act upon something rather than actually experiencing it. But I am quite aware that it is there, hanging right over head daunting on me. More than likely I will act upon it sooner later or forget about it completely. I feel as if no matter what I accomplish that it is not good enough and further fuels my need to be better/do better for myself. Other times I lack the confidence, will power, strength, or however one may put it, to actually change. I should not have to live this way and yet I do, some days are fine and others are not. Everyday I face a new challenge, big and small and I attempt to do all that I can to make it more gratifying than the last.

Hamlet is much more capably human than all the other characters. Polonius, Ophelia, the Queen, Claudius are outrageous, for their characters are not typically human. These other characters are morbidly self-serving and conniving that they do not act for others. There are people whom their characters relate to, but are not humanly sincere.  Their characters magnify Hamlet's persona so one is able to understand his innermost thoughts and why he acts the way he does. While all  the other characters are just bits and pieces of a whole human.

Thoughts from Tumblr #6

I keep thinking about college. Basically everything around me involves college. Getting good grades for college. Personal statements for college. Letters of recommendations for college. Applying for scholarships for college. AND ABOVE ALL..paying for college. What are we really paying for? (Besides the traditional room & board, books, etc.) I feel like I have finally found out why college is so damn expensive. We are basically paying the college for existing on their school grounds.

Thoughts from Tumblr #5

I really wonder why this is? I doubt myself all the time & just end up not saying anything at all because i'm afraid to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. I over-analyze everything and make something worse than it actually is. Why is that the others just talk before they speak & don't stop to think, "maybe I shouldn't say that." They present themselves with this air of confidence even if they are wrong. Could they be doing something right? Or maybe I am doing something wrong?

Encouraging Open Source Learning

This past weekend I was catching up with an old friend & we began discussing school. I mentioned Hamlet & my friend cringed. She preceded to tell me she hated studying the play & my response was that I loved it. She then questioned my sanity & this is when I told her about Open Source Learning. She told me that reading Hamlet made her want to drop out of her AP class ( she goes to OA). 

I gave her the link to Dr. Preston's AP blog & told her to explore. I said if you need help with Hamlet read through our blogs & any other confusion to ask me. I explained to her that analyzing the play shouldn't be a hassle & that she should get with a group of friends to act it out just like our period 5 class had. I told her through our blogs we are able to collaborate & create new ideas & that she should make one for her class too. With the Internet we can learn just about anything & communicate with just about anyone around the world. It all just depends on how we use these resources. I really hope she precedes with creating a blog & expands her learning boundaries with in her school because every student should not be limited within these dim rooms we call classrooms. 

Thoughts from Tumblr #2,3,4

This first one feels so relevant to what we are learning in Hamlet right now that I felt like I should post this. Not only does this relate to the play, but it applies to life. We as a society are afraid to take risks, fear begins to run our lives & can even drive someone to the breaking point.

People are so consumed with their own lives. They are more worried about themselves, rather than anybody else. Which is true among a majority of society.  No matter what we will not be able to please everybody, even if we are completely ourselves. When we start comparing ourselves to others, that is when the real trouble begins. Most are just focused on themselves even if that means others unfortunately get brought down in the process.

And finally this last one hits really close to home. I use to be so afraid and hesitant to speak my mind that I would refrain from saying anything at all. I absolutely HATE (& I do not like using the word hate often) disappointing everyone including myself and to cause drama. But then I realize that things will never change if I do not act now. I woke up. Now I do not take any crap from anyone & take control to fix a wrong.

 I just be.